Habit Formation

 Habit Formation

What does it take to build a good habit and have it stick? And what does it take to break a bad habit? To understand this we must look at the anatomy of a habit. A habit has essentially three parts. A cue, a routine, and a reward. 

The cue is something that is used to draw your attention to the habit. For example, keeping your workout clothes next to your bed so that it's the first thing you see when you wake up and you can easily wear them & rush off to the gym first thing in the morning. 

The routine is a fixed time for the habit. Deciding that you will go to the gym first thing in the morning or every day at 6 PM is important. Our brain likes to follow a routine. It keeps track of what you do at every minute of the day and begins to expect the same thing to continue every day. For example, if you eat at a particular time of the day, you slowly begin to get hungry around that time every day.

The reward is something you get at the end of engaging in the habit you want to build. An incentive to keep repeating the habit. A reward helps you associate positively with the habit you are trying to build. It is also important that one must not get carried away and distracted by the reward.

To cultivate a habit, you must break it into these three parts. The presence of all of the 3 things - a cue, a routine, and a reward is essential. Let's say you want to start the habit of reading every day. The cue could be keeping the book you want to read on your bedside table. You can decide to read at 10 PM every day. And you can reward yourself with your favorite tea or 5 minutes extra of your favorite TV show. 

To break a habit, the reverse must be done. Remove the cue, remove the routine and remove the reward. For example, to quit the habit of eating unhealthy food, you can begin by removing all the snacks and treats from your house. You can remove them from the pantry, the fridge, the bed, and the secret stash area. If you generally eat snacks late at night, you can engage in some other activity at that time. Maybe, you can just go to sleep. Most importantly, remove the reward. What is the reward of eating unhealthy food? It is the euphoric feeling junk food gives. Try to dissociate slowly from this feeling and find healthier things that give you the same joy.

It takes 40 days to build a habit. Build sustainable habits. Do not try to build the habit of reading 5 books a day or try to spend 5 hours in the gym every day. These habits are not sustainable. Map out your life, daily routine, resources, energy, important commitments, work commitments, and be realistic with the time that you can dedicate to the habit. Go easy on yourself. The key to building a habit is consistency. So, engaging in the habit should be sustainable. You should be able to do it every day. 

Many people do not think they can build and maintain a habit. Many people have convinced themselves they can never give up some of their bad habits. They have made it a part of their personality. Part of their life story. When I mention that I read a book every week, someone told me they wanted to do the same but can never imagine themselves being able to. They said they would give up within two weeks and they were convinced of it. The thing is you will build it over time and it is possible to get rid of your limiting belief if truly realize this. Once the body and mind get used to the habit, it will get easier to maintain a habit. 

And the body and mind do get used to activities that are done diligently daily. For example, exercising. Before I began going to the gym, I was convinced I could never maintain the habit for long. I gave myself three to four months. On the first day, my beliefs were confirmed by how tedious & boring I found exercising. But I ensured I at least showed up at the gym every single day. And with time my body and my mind both fell in line. My body began to enjoy the physical exertion. My mind began to enjoy the endorphins that were released during exercising. And the more I stuck to the habit, the easier and enjoyable it became for me. And to think, this was something I thought I would never be capable of doing. So you just need to push yourself and start. Just show up.

Another tip I'd like to share about cultivating a habit is to figure out why a habit is truly bad or good for you. We already know exercise and eating healthy is good for us. But then again, do we? Most of us only have surface-level information about these things. I want you to go down the rabbit hole and figure out everything good or bad about a habit that you are trying to build or break. 

A lot of people exercise to lose weight. But many can tell you that if this your sole reason, you may not stick to the habit. What if you focused on all the benefits of exercise? Exercise has a ton of mental health benefits. Exercise builds physical and mental discipline. Exercise improves mood and helps you to be active throughout the day. Exercise can also help improve your posture. I began to eat healthy after watching a YouTube video that gives an in-depth explanation of what sugar does to your body and brain. 

You should be able to summarize in your own words exactly why a habit is bad or good. It must be clear in your mind, why you want a good habit or do not want a bad habit. Once you have convinced yourself about why the habit is good or bad and gained confidence that you can build and maintain it, you have to wait only 40 days